I want to grow old with you

12 Nov
Scan - Version 2

November 12, 2004

Today marks ten years of marriage for my husband and I!  I have to admit;  if you asked me three days ago if I was over then moon excited I’d have told you, “Meh”.  Life has been so overwhelming and stressful lately that nothing seemed like a big deal. I’m happy we’ve made it so far when a lot of people had their doubts.  I mean really, who thinks most nineteen year olds will make it?  I knew we would.  I loved him back then and I love him even more today.  We’ve been through so much in our ten years of marriage (most of it early on) that the next ten years might not be so trying <fingers crossed>.  I know, I’m full of crap, what am I saying?  Of course the next ten years are going to be trying and the reason I say that is because of this…Marriage is not easy.  Marriage is work.  But when you put Christ in the middle of a marriage it will flourish.  There is nothing I would change.  The choices we made back then and every time after that, whether right or wrong, have led us to be where we our now.  We’ve struggled but we learned how to manage.  We’ve had fun, laughed and grew up together.  We were babies when we got married.  Just out of high school, me in college and working, him in the Marine Corps.  We didn’t know what we were doing but we did it.  We made mistakes and screwed up time and time again but we fixed it.  Let me say this too, when I say ‘we’ I don’t mean my husband and I alone, God was part of that ‘we’.  If there is one thing I can say to anyone about marriage is this:  Marry someone who loves Christ as much or more than they love you.  That is ok.  Only one person should come before your spouse and that is Him.  Never give up when things get hard because I promise you they will get hard.  Remember this also, love that person wholeheartedly, unselfishly, and have fun every day.  Life is too short to stay angry.

I found someone who won’t let me be mad at him.  He says that’s the only reason he was able to keep me because there’s no way I would have put up with his crap if I was able to stay mad.  His words not mine.  What I wish he would realize is that I can’t stay mad at him because he is my best friend, my husband, father of our kids and because my heart also belongs to Jesus.  My heart is so filled with love for Him that the relationship I have with my husband has improved.  God blessed me early in life with my husband when I know some people have to wait years to find their mate.  I know I was lucky, blessed, that I don’t want to hold on to anything that will tear it apart.  Ask me today how I feel about our anniversary, my answer is this:  I loved him then and I love him now.  Today is a milestone that I’m proud of and I am ready for the next stage in our lives.  Thank you for being my husband, my friend, my comedian, the father of our kids and my true love.

Danny, Elsa and the housewife

1 Nov

So I talked my husband into dressing up for halloween.  I love halloween.  He was Jon Snow and I was Daenerys Targaryen from Game of Thrones.  I was so excited that for once we were dressing up and matching!  He is such a mule when it comes to that kind of stuff.  A few days before halloween I started getting nervous about my costume.  I’m not skinny and I kept thinking about how people would make fun of me for dressing up as someone so popular and beautiful when I so obviously don’t fit that description.  I contemplated taking it back, not wanting that kind of attention.  All I wanted was to have fun.  Did I mention I love halloween?  Halloween arrives and my husband even found a baby dragon to put on my shoulder so I sucked it up and wore my Danny costume with excitement.  Even though I know I looked nothing like Danny I played the part.  While we were walking the kids around I started noticing little girls staring at me with wide eyes and a grin.  I just smiled brightly and waved.  It didn’t occur to me until my husband jokingly reminds me that I’m contributing to people getting drunk every time we show up at their door (the drinking game going around online) that I was being mistaken for someone else.  I didn’t get the joke until I remembered what my four year old niece who was dressed as Elsa from Frozen yelled when she saw me, “Macole (I love how she says my name) we’re both Elsa!”  There it is.  Only a few people knew who I was supposed to be and that was because I had the dragon on my shoulder.  Of course I knew kids wouldn’t know who I was portraying so when all the little girls staring at me with joyous expression thought I was Elsa I didn’t say otherwise.  Let me just say this, I’m not a huge fan of that movie (I know–SHOCK!) but the way those cute little girls running around looking at me was so enlightening.  I’m going to stop here and skip stories for a minute but I promise I will come back around to this.  Now, listen to the song ‘Let it go’.  I have to admit, I’ve never really paid attention to the lyrics.

Ever feel like no matter how hard you try you’ll never quite fit in and always feel like a second thought to someone?  I know that feeling well.  It can make you feel like a piece of crap.  I had other thoughts but honestly, that pretty much sums it up.  I feel left out and not good enough around some pretty important people.  I feel like I just don’t matter.  <insert world’s smallest violin playing>

God has a funny way of reminding us that we really do matter.  I’ve heard this song, ‘Greater’ often and I love it.  It wasn’t until tonight when I was upset that it came on the radio while on that rare occasion I was by myself.  I didn’t know how much I needed to hear it but when it started playing I heard it in a knew way.  The lyrics meant something more to me.

Now putting ‘Let it go’ and ‘Greater’ together (not literally) you can get a sense of empowerment.  When I try to be someone else just to make people like me I’m holding back what God needs me to be.  By letting it go and forgetting that other’s think that I am not enough I can be who God has called me to be.  “Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the lord assigned to him and to which God has called him.”  1 Corinthians 7:17

The lyrics, (Greater) “Bring your tired and bring your shame, bring your guilt and bring your pain, don’t you know its not your name, you will always be much more to me…Because I hear a voice and he calls me redeemed when others say I’ll never be enough…I am learning to run freely understanding just how he sees me and it makes me love him more and more.” (Let It Go) “I don’t care what they’re going to say let the storm rage on…Its time to see what I can do.  To test the limits and break through…Here I stand in the light of day, let the storm rage on.”  As dorky and unusual as me relating these two songs together is, I can’t help but feel better.  Crazy as it sounds, after hearing ‘Greater’ tonight it made everything click about last night, here and now.  Those beautiful little girls that kept looking in awe of me or rather my costume and didn’t see the insecure, fat, lonely, unimportant person that I am made to feel.  They saw me as a beautiful and important person.  The same way God sees me.  Time and time again I go over this in my head.  Its one of my biggest flaws–forgetting how wonderfully I am made.  Last night I won’t lie, I was annoyed everyone (and by everyone I mean adults) thought I was Elsa but my husband said this to me, “Who cares that no one got your costume, you made those little kids happy when they saw a real grown up Elsa.”  Sometimes that man make sense ;)  I need to look at myself as God sees me (I know, same old story different verse–I said it was a bad flaw of mine) and like through the innocence of a child.  They don’t see the same things adults do.  They didn’t see an overweight house mom playing dress up.  They saw something beautiful.  <SIGH> Ok, enough of that.  I’ll leave you with this and be done. :)  Pictures of last night of who I was supposed to be verses who I was thought to be and who I really am (in costume and out).  Also, my kids b/c they were too darn cute!  And my little Elsa who thought it was awesome we were dressed the same and saw nothing but beauty.


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My beautiful niece as Elsa20141031_202956

Pinkie Pie, Captain Rex and GarfieldDSC_0233

This is who I am.  I’m a mom.20140715_174026_2  I’m a wife.


The woman made in God’s image.


City on our knees

18 Oct

It seems my faith has been directly or indirectly been thrown in my face.  Between the state of Arizona legalizing homosexual marriage and the ebola outbreak; things from the past and the Mayor of Houston subpoenaing several pastor’s sermons I’m feeling as if everything I believe is wrong.  I know it isn’t wrong but society keeps telling me that it is.  I will not back down.  They say that if I don’t accept what the world feels is right then I’m judgmental or homophobic, or self-righteous.  And it really sucks that some of my family is so judgmental towards me b/c of these things.  I know how some of them feel about particular  topics and I’ve never once told them they were wrong, just that I don’t agree.  I’ve learned to pick and choose my battles but I have to say, its getting more difficult by the day to live in a world where I offend people just because I believe differently.  Doesn’t matter if I state that opinion out loud; because they know what’s in my heart, I’m automatically wrong because they think so and they hold that grudge whether they know it or not.  Doesn’t anyone know the truth of the words of God?  My heart is sadden.

I’ve always felt that I could never be a missionary outside of the U.S.  I’ve never wanted to be.  I know that sounds wrong and honestly I know I should feel differently but this is where my heart is.  One of my bffs and her family are planning a mission trip to Africa.  First off, don’t get me started on the ebola crap b/c she won’t listen–stubborn woman.  Secondly, I love that she has a heart for missions and it makes me feel bad that I don’t feel the need to go over there or any where for that matter.  She pointed out to me that God puts things on our hearts and this is something she feels she should do.  It made me realized that America still needs a lot of help here.  We are failing as a nation to take care of our own and if everyone leaves to mission out of the country who is going to help ours?  My heart is at home, not overseas.  This country is going to crap faster than it has in the past.  Our nation has always been on a moral decline and so forth but lately it has declined quickly.  If we don’t stand up for what is the truth then how can anyone expect things to get better?  I’m not the first Christian to be persecuted and I won’t be the last.  I will stand and fight.

I know God has something planned for me.  I can feel it within the depth of my soul and I know it will be monumental.  I just don’t know what it is.  I can say from past experience that I’ve always been the one to plant a seed.  I’ve never been the one to help it grow.  I’ve never personally brought someone to Christ.  In sunday school we’ve started a new lesson on this.  When I found out my heart leapt with excitement and nervousness.  I know something is going to happen and I’m going to need to know this.  I’ve grown up in church but never has my walk with Christ been so involved as it has been in the past three or so years.  It has taken our family to be moved to another state, away from anyone I knew, my husband being deployed and me living on my own for the first time in my life (with three young kids of course) to bring me where I am now.  I’m not anywhere close to where I need to be.   In fact, I will never get tired of learning about the the truth.  There is so much more I have to learn in order to keep growing in my faith.  Every time I open my bible I find something new.  Even if I’ve read it before, underlined it, I still get something new out of it.

I’ve been praying, asking for guidance.  Like stated before, I know something is coming and I know I need to be ready.  I’m scared and nervous but I know that God will give me the words to say.  Most of the time I feel like Moses; not a great speaker, scared that I’ll say something wrong.  God’s got this.  I had conformation tonight about my feelings.  I came across bible verses, all in different places.  I didn’t know what I was looking for but I just knew I needed something.  Ironically the verses I found tonight were already underlined–I just needed a reminder.

As a nation we need to step up, not be scared and fight for this country.  We need to be a city on our knees.

I know that y’all probably won’t understand why I needed to be reminded of these verses but they were what I needed to see.  I’ve been under a lot of attacks lately and this just gives me the reassurance that no matter what comes my way, I will not deny my Father in heaven.  He will take care of me.  He is the Alpha and the Omega-the beginning and the end.

I am the way the truth and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me.  John 14:6

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth.  Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly.  2 Timothy 2:15-16

And the Lord’s servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.  Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will.  2 Timothy 2:24-26

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction faithful in prayer.  Romans 12:12

I am only one person but if we all rally together and stand for the truth, not back down when the devil tries to tear us apart we will succeed.  I’ve never felt this strongly about this kind of thing before but as a Christian I can not stand by and not do something.  God has placed this on my heart and I can’t ignore Him.

Suck It Up, For You Are Dearly Loved

17 Aug

My best friend got married today.  Jamie and I have been friends since third grade–that’s 21 years.  We made it through so much.  Separate high schools, miles and states apart.  She went to college and I got married and had kids and the military lifestyle took over.  But through all that today I was her matron of honor–something I’ve always hoped I would be.  I was there to help her pick out her wedding dress, there for every fitting and wouldn’t have had it any other way.  But with every step of her wedding plans my insecurity started to make its way inside my head, make me doubt things.  My entire life Jamie has been the pretty one, the curvy one, the girl that guys notice.  Me?  Well, its amazing how something so long ago can make me cringe thinking about it now.  I was the ugly, fat friend.  The tough one.  The sporty one.  I was never thought as beautiful.  I thought I’d let that feeling go a long time ago.  That feeling of being invisible or unworthy.  Not up to par.  I’m comfortable wearing basketball shorts, not wearing makeup.  I am so comfortable with who I am (minus my weight) that I like how I look without makeup.  <sigh>……Nope, still have that unworthy feeling when I’m next to her.  How insane is it for me to feel so crappy on such a great day?  All I wanted for myself was to look pretty.  Feel pretty, standing next to one of the most important people in my life and I shuttered looking at the pictures on my camera.  I can’t get past how nasty I look.  How overweight I am.  For all the wishing and wanting to look good, it wouldn’t have mattered.  Here I was sweating through my t-shirt and shorts as I set up all the chairs and tables.  I loved helping her mom and sister get things together for the wedding but dang if I wished I was with Jamie staying cool and calm getting her makeup professionally done in the next room.  Her hair was amazing and mine was thrown together by two clips after trying to dry the sweat from my hair with a flat iron, which I got distracted from and burned the skin off my forehead 15 minutes before the wedding.  Ever had to put makeup over a fresh burn wound?  It hurts.  So here I felt like a mess.  I looked a mess. I just wanted to be as pretty as my friend and that didn’t happen.  Doesn’t help that after I got home and collapsed on the bed that my husband says, “When are you gonna wash that crap off your face?”  Ha!  Yep, he HATES when I wear makeup so that was icing on the cake.  Of course my woman brain is thinking he could have said, “You look nice.”  Just one more punch to the gut I guess.  Well you know what?  This is where I get over myself, wash my face, put on my yoga pants and wrap my hair in a pony tail just thankful I’m out of those shoes and into my camo crocs.  Imagine how much better I felt.  Still doesn’t keep me from cringing at the wedding photos that I can only hope turned out better by the professional photographer.

So what is the point to my whiney rant on how crappy I felt and how completely 100% selfish I sound about my best friends wedding?  Honestly, it didn’t hit me until about an hour ago when I was reading my bible and decided that even though I kept all these thoughts in my head, put on a (genuine) smile for the wedding that God knew exactly what I was thinking.  He knew that I was judging myself and comparing what I look like to her.  I also know He didn’t like it.  There are two things that I am trying to remember.  1.  That God loves me.  He loves me the way I am because I am perfect in His imagine.  He created me.  2.  No matter what I may be feeling on the inside, someone else could be seeing something different.  If I continue to show God’s love through my actions and words then that will shine brighter than the zit that was so perfectly place on my face for the wedding.  Word of advice…don’t ever do a face mask three days before an important occasion.

So I am sucking it up.  I will never be what society thinks is beautiful but at least I know that God thinks that I am.  Besides, isn’t He the only opinion of me that matters?  FOR I AM DEARLY LOVED! AND SO ARE YOU!

“There fore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.  Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another.  Forgive as the Lord forgave you.  And over all these virtues, put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”  Colossians 3: 12-14


It might raise a fuss but…

13 Aug

I can’t sleep tonight.  In fact, my mind is racing going over and over as to why the majority of people think they can get to heaven only doing good works and being a good person.  It physically hurts my head right now trying to stop this internal debate so I can sleep.  Family, friends, celebrities are dying.  It happens and its heartbreaking.  Death is a part of life.  But I see death on this earth as only the beginning of my new life in heaven.  I know without a doubt that when this body of mine is gone my soul will be rejoicing in heaven forever. Forever is a long time.  Imaginable really.  We use that word so often that it seems to have lost its meaning.  “This class is taking forever.” Or, “No one wants to wait around forever.”  Think about that.  We sit at a stop light and it feels like it takes forever because we want to get where we are going.  What if someone looked at their life and thought of it in those terms.  “I need to get where I’m going.”  Or,  “Where is my life headed?”  Where is your life headed?  Is everything you do making the Lord happy?  Does it glorify Him?  Think about it…when this life is over, where will you be?  Heaven or hell?  Because frankly I don’t think there can be one without the other.  I’ve had a lot of problems with this concerning other people.  Family, friends, heck even strangers on the street make me wonder about eternity.  Sounds dumb doesn’t it?  As Christians we need to be diligent (but not off putting or pushy) about telling people of eternity.  My eternity is Jesus.  This doesn’t mean that I am running up to strangers and telling them they will rot in hell—that’s just mean and stupid and just turns people away from Christ.  Catch more flies with honey than vinegar is what my mom always says.  If you want me to be honest, I’m not even the type to ask randomly if they know about Jesus.  It freaks me out.  But I live my life so people don’t have to ask if I have a close and personal relationship with Him.  There is no doubt that people know who my heavenly father is.  There’s no need to throw it in someone’s face but live your life like forever starts tomorrow.  I’m not talking about YOLO (I totally hate that saying) and doing stupid crap.  I’m talking about knowing where and who you will spend forever with.

My husband and I are what the bible calls unequally yoked.  I love him with all my heart but we definitely see things differently.  He believes in God and we’ve had discussions but I have a hard time debating things with him because he makes me feel judgmental when he starts to feel uncomfortable about what we’re talking about.  Anyway, I read an article about the late Robin Williams and how society is choosing to imagine him in heaven like his movie “What Dreams May Come.”  Its a sweet notion but is he really?  First off, I’m not picking on Robin Williams.  I have great respect for all he has done and what he as accomplished but because he is the current topic and its raised questions in my mind.  Does it sadden anyone to not know for sure if he’s in heaven?  I’ve read articles with interviews from him and there is doubt in my mind about where he is at.  This breaks my heart deeply.  My husband says he “chooses to believe he is in heaven.”  We might choose to believe he is in heaven to make ourselves feel better but is he in fact praising God at this moment?  Is that stranger who was hit by a car and killed raising her hands in worship?  If you died right now where would your soul go?  See, choosing to believe someone is in peace in naive.  I want to know!  I want there to be no doubt in my mind about what happens to my loved ones after death.  Doing good works and being nice to people is great and wonderful but it will not get you to heaven.  There is only one way to get to heaven and that cannot be ignored.  Jesus states in John 14:6 “I am the way and the truth and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me.”  Right there.  Right in this single verse says it all.  Jesus then goes on to say in v7, “If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well.”  Knowing Jesus, recognizing what He did for my sin, having a relationship with Jesus, gets me to heaven.  By all means, do great things, live like Jesus lived but know who your savior is.  Philippians 2:5  “Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.” 

One last thing…just for the record— I’m not better than anyone else.  God has only given me His mercy.  I’m still a sinner and I will continue to be a sinner but I’m trying.  Romans 12:3 “For by the grace given I say to everyone of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought but rather think of yourself with sober judgment in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you.”  I once heard this in a sermon and I wrote it down thinking that one day I would want the reminder.  He said, “God isn’t just the starting point of your life; He’s the source of it.  Turn to God’s word, not the world’s wisdom.”  I apologize for having this rant or if reading this makes you angry but to me, its truth.  I felt that I needed to share my thoughts—even if no one reads this at least I put it out there. <3

I do care

12 Aug

“My five year old daughter has to have surgery again.  My sweet, loving baby girl has to have kidney surgery….AGAIN!”  This is what I thought sitting in my car in the parking garage trying to process the information her urologist/surgeon told me.  I’m trying to figure out how to tell my husband and explain it to my kid, who is in the back seat talking to me and I’ve heard nothing she has said.  

My husband didn’t take it well.  Neither did my dad.  Or my mom.  According to everyone else I’m the only one who seems to ‘not care’.  Well, that’s a load of bull.  

According to the doctor the plan was to remove the bottom of her right kidney because of scar tissue and the lack of use it has, along with the utterer that is causing the reflux which in turn is causing her infections and more scar tissue.  She was born with two utterers–that’s not normal.  Her first surgery only downgraded her reflux from a 4 to a 3 (5 is the highest).  So this is how we were going to fix it.  I was ok with it.  Ok as one could be about their child having kidney surgery.  

People keep asking me how everyone else is taking the news about the surgery.  No one asked how I was doing.  Does that sound selfish?  Probably, but I’m human.  Evidently I seem to not care (as previously stated).  Oh I care.  I care a lot.  I’ve just had more time to process the information since I’ve been the only one who has taken her to all her doctor appointments, shown her how to pee in a cup and the one to give her medicine every single time she gets an infection.  I’m the one who sat alone in the doctor’s office trying to wrap my head around the fact that after everything we have done, it still wasn’t good enough to keep her from having another surgery.  But here’s my secret.  I wasn’t really alone in that office.  God was with me.  I know that He is the one in control.  I know that he will guide the surgeon’s hands.  This is why it seems I don’t care.  I have FAITH.  Plain and simple.  I don’t believe in blind faith–just plain old faith.  Having faith isn’t seeing something to believe it, its believing when you can’t see it.  I believe God is in control.  He already knows the outcome of her surgery.  Of her life.  Our future is His past b/c God already knows.  

I won’t lie when sometimes I speak to God I question ‘why?’  I don’t have an answer for that.  I won’t bargain with Him to heal her–that’s not how prayer works.  But I do speak to Him like he is my best friend.  I don’t need anyone to speak for me.

I know that God listens.  Sometimes when we want answers He waits for us to come to Him first.  I try to do that.  I lay in bed crying while everyone is asleep.  I asked God that question, ‘why?’  Then, we talked.  Sounds weird right?  He didn’t answer me back that night.  But He did the next morning. I want to say this, to me praying comes easy.  It used to not but I started looking at it in a different way.  He is my friend and He wants me to come to Him.  He already knows what I’m feeling and thinking so there is no point in holding back.  God knows that I am nervous but I’m not scared b/c I know who goes before me.  Its that simple.  That’s my reasoning.  Its why I appear to not care or think its such a big deal.  My faith is strong and I have hope.  

The plans for her surgery were in the past tense.  The next morning after my long talk with God the doctor called.  Turns out Kate has more function in her lower kidney than they previously thought and they no longer feel the need to remove half of her kidney but instead are going to try and fix the implant.  I feel lighter at that.  God listens.  God heals.  Now, I’ll pray that this time her surgery actually fixes the problem completely.  

 One of my favorite bible verses:

“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”  Romans 12:12

A roach, a bug, and a husband

4 Jul

So its been an uphill battle some days. Other days I couldn’t ask for a better day. Sadly, it all depends on my husband’s mood. Today, I can say that my husband was in a good mood. Why? Well, first let me explain something. I hate roaches. Don’t care what someone calls them. Water bugs, cock roaches, whatever–they are all the same stinkin’ nasty things and sometimes they fly. I squeal when I have to kill them and I flinch when I have to clean the dead thing up. I have been known to hide them under the shoe I killed it with and I have also been known to bribe my kid with money to pick it up for me. Yes, yes, I know…mother of the year right here! Oh, lets not forget my puppy face and “Daddy, pleeeeease?!” tone–not ashamed to still call my dad, Daddy, after all, I’m a southern girl. And before I forget, yes, we are temporarily staying with my parents until we get a house. Joy joy and many stories I could tell you but for now, on with my current ramblings. So since I have already explained my uneasiness with roaches I have also come to learn that I am bigger than the roach and it won’t kill me to smash the thing. ::gags:: Still doesn’t change the fact that they freak me out.

Late last night I happened to be the only one up and b/c of all the rain we’ve gotten they tend to show up here or there from time to time. So when I saw one I got the nerve to kill it. I figured that when I killed the roach I could leave it and let my mom or dad clean it up since they just happened to get up before everyone for work. Hey! Before you say anything, I at least killed it without squealing…the kids were asleep so I had to keep a lid on the noise. Anyway, I guess my parents knew my game and I had to be the one to clean it up. I used a fly swatter to pick it up and before I knew it my husband is next to me. Ok, my husband has a warped sense of humor that I normally love. Just not today. As I bravely turn to walk to the trash holding the fly swatter with a still twitching nasty thing, my husband smacks the fly swatter sending the roach flying in the air, me throwing the fly swatter away and I take off running. Looking back, I see that probably wasn’t a good idea. Its like shooting an arrowing in the air and not knowing where it will land. He is laughing as I locate the fly swatter. As I bend down to pick it back up I see him throw something at me. It was a June Bug. Yep, I freaked out thinking he had thrown the roach at me…I don’t know why I thought my husband would pick it up with his hand–I lacked a bit of common sense during this bug duress I was under. I also can’t figure out where the June Bug came from. He starts laughing again as I throw down everything and run to the bathroom to shower. I can at least say that he got rid of the June bug and roach for me.

As disturbing as this scene is, I am grateful that I can sit here typing and laugh about it now. I was actually laughing at the time too but it was more of a “Are you freaking kidding me?” laugh. I love him. I love his warped sense of humor and I love that if anything my husband can be himself–no matter what–around me.

No matter the crap that gets thrown at us, or I should say bugs, I know we’ve got each other’s back. He did after all pick up the roach for me ;)


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